Have you ever felt that you belong nowhere? That you have no national identity? I certainly did…and still do.
Being born in a Hungarian family in Romania, by the age of 6 I was fluent in both Hungarian and Romanian. I started to study in a Romanian primary school for two years, the next two I was moved to the Hungarian section. Then, secondary school and high school followed in English and Romanian. Now I am in Germany for almost 5 years trying to pimp up my German. Moreover, I also did a Spanish and Hebrew course about two years ago to complete my vast foreign language knowledge. The result: none of the languages I speak / write is correct...Taking into account that English is an international language and not my mother tongue, it is easier for me to express myself (even though you will probably find some mistakes here and there ;) ...at least I "excused" myself).
And back to national identity: am I Romanian? am I Hungarian? ...cause German I'm certainly not! In Romania I always felt like an "outsider"; probably thanks to my Hungarian last name, which was never spelled / pronounced correctly and the small declination / conjugation mistakes I used to make, which were quickly corrected by colleagues, teachers... sometimes the reason for a good laugh. In Hungary...was worse. I experienced several situations when I was looked down upon as being the "Hungarian from Romania". I probably have to thank this to my Hungarian accent which is a clear sign of not having been born / raised in Hungary. I also felt disappointed when the Hungarians voted against giving "Hungarian Romanians" a Hungarian citizenship / passport. At least, now in Germany I got used to being an "Ausländer" (= Foreigner) and I can deal with it much better. Still, I own a Romanian pass, and I am coming from Eastern Europe which makes certain things difficult to bear. I hate it, when every time I arrive in Germany, my pass is checked page by page and the queue behind me is already wondering what's wrong, what have I done.
My only relief is that due to the European Union, there is a considerable growth in population migration...and therefore children nowadays are usually born in mixed families. I really hope that in few years time, there will be less stress on nationality and it would be just enough to say: "I am European"!
very nice dear:) i can totally understand you ;) hopefully things will change, at least for our children:D
Szilvi, I am also of Hungarian nationality living in Romania, but I feel Hungarian. And I will apply for Hungarian citizenship (it's possible starting next year) as soon as possible, because the latest news is they voted that Hungarian nationals all over the world may request Hungarian citizenship. Good luck to you :)
Köszönöm Melinda for your comment! :-) It's a nice surprise to see people are actually reading this blog. :-) Yes...I've heard that Hungarians from all over the world can apply for the citizenship, FINALLY!!!! Good luck to you too!
Greetings from rainy Germany